At a friend’s house when I was growing up, stuck to the fridge was a wise saying. “Life is a series of lessons. They are not pass/fail. They will be repeated until you learn them.” At times I find that I must repeat certain lessons because I have forgotten them.
Most recently, I have relearnt that people are human, and in spite of their stated values and previous actions, they do sometimes fail to live up to expectations.
I’m sure you all know what I’m talking about. We’re all guilty of it as well, although the cognitive dissonance between the person we are and the person we want to be often causes us to conveniently…forget.
It’s important to remember when this happens that you are as much a victim of your image of the person as the person is themselves. They did not let you down. They did not “fail to perform.” They did the best they good with the tools and resources they had at the time. . . As we all do.
Perhaps the image you held in your mind of the perfect response to the situation was founded in reality–perhaps not. Perhaps the person was never capable of whatever you imagined them to be. But there’s no use weeping over what’s done. It is what it is. Accept it and move on.
Like I said, it’s one of those lessons you have to learn over and over again